I am so freaked out. Today was the second beta. I'm waiting on my phone call to tell me what the number is. I am so freaked out. On one hand, it feels so real that I can't believe it could be taken away so quickly. On the other, it feels so unreal that I kinda ask myself - would it really be that surprising? I'm totally on edge. Marc didn't go with me today, and there was someone other than CJ who drew my blood. Needless to say, it worried me. I'm just so freaked. I feel so attached to it and the idea and the future and everything, that I don't know what I'd do if it turned out not to be real. I don't feel like I really fit in on either board over on the Nest and can't talk about it to anyone because no one knows.
I swear this is worse than the 2ww. I just need to relax. What happened to the calm, serene Lawren of the 2ww? lol she disappeared the minute I found out I was pregnant and heard the number. I cherish every symptom, the sore boobs and slight cramping in my back and stomach. I've peed on all the sticks I have at home, hoping to see them turn right away. I bought more on my way to work. I NEED this number to come back high. Please, God. I'm so ready for this.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment